Officemessenger: I hope I can make it home before the rain tonight.
Office moron #1: It's gonna rain? Oh my God!
Me: How is it that you're always surprised when you hear that it's gonna rain? Don't you check the weather forecast in the morning? They said it was gonna rain.
Office moron #1: I know they said there would be rain. I just didn't think it would really rain.
Me (internal dialog): Yes, of course. Those meteorologists have absolutely no idea what they're talking about, so they just make up some random shit in order to make thousands of people tote around umbrellas that they will never use. In the future, I will be sure to consult you before I leave the house so that I can know what the real weather is going to be.